Saturday, December 10, 2016

What 'Now' Looks Like


I know, Selfies...
Right?

I'm sure if you follow my facebook page, you can see that I think selfies are great.
So much that I've been rockin' them and cuttin' off heads since the days of 110 instamatic film.

2016.
A lot has happened in my head, in my heart, in my family and in our world.
I have been reading a lot. Writing a lot. Thinking a lot. Growing a lot.
I've changed.

One thing I've zeroed in and focused on is practicing mindfulness.
Zeroing in and being awake to the present moment and being aware.
Being present.
In the Now.

There must be at least a hundred blog posts and stories I've wanted to share with you that I have either written and haven't posted or written on paper and haven't transferred to screen, or recorded vocally on my phone, but not transcribed, or formed in my head, but not sat down to communicate.


And that brings me to the idea of the meaningful selfie.
There have been moments in the last year...
that I have not wanted to forget.
"Ah ha" moments. Moments filled with happiness, sadness, joy, fear, sorrow, silliness and gratefulness.
In these moments, I've tried to remember to snap a selfie....
to be reminded and to see...
what that moment looked like.
I am a visual learner. A memory keeper.
I want to remember....
What joy looks like on my face, what fear looks like, what gratitude looks like.
A visible reminder of
What the "now" looks and looked like.

Once I get this page back up and running,
I hope to share some of those many stories and blog posts with you....
but for now...
I'm introducing the idea of the meaningful selfie.
(too bad it's such a scary one ;)

Here's the story behind this selfie....

For two years now...
I've known that it is time for my life on Main Street to draw to a close and that I need turn and face north.
(That story is a whole other blog post).

So, in September...
I and the other residents of our apartment building got a letter from the landlord that he had sold the building to the Carmel Redevelopment Committee.
(yes, Main Streets fate is as bad as the name of that committee makes it sound)
However, I was not blindsided...
I was not frantic.
Sad...
yes, Of course.
I LOVE this building.
I LOVE this apartment.
I LOVE the lives that have crossed paths living here.

I do not want this building to be demolished.
But, if you know anything about what has been happening in any corner of Carmel,
we all knew it was coming eventually....
And, what a few years ago would have devastated me,
was not a huge blow,
because I had already made peace with the fact and resolved that my time here was coming to a close.

We were originally told we would need to be out by Dec. 31....
giving us a three month window.

But then, we were contacted by the City and told that they were extending our leases into the new year....and the very earliest would be Spring of 2017...possibly summer or fall.

So, the elephant was still in the room...
but not standing on our chests.
We eased on the fretting and packing.
We went on vacatons.
I went to Baptisms. I went to parties. I went to Sunday dinners.
All the while I kept purging and packing...
One neighbor went ahead and pursued other housing and just last week moved to another place.
I was amazed at how quickly it all happened for her.
But, I decided to spend December working on Family Christmas video and New Year's Party plans and then,
when the Sunday Dinner Martha's go off on their winter vacations...
I would hermit myself in Indy and focus on packing,
hoping to move in April...
And starting a new chapter around my Birthday...
Happy New Year to me!

So, imagine our surprise Wednesday night...
when we who are left on Main Street found a letter from the Committee in our mailboxes...
stating that the new date is NOT the spring as were had been told...
but it has been changed to Jan. 31. !!


Needless to say....We are not happy.

The moment you realized you've been screwed and double screwed.
(so that's what that looks like)



Directions to here:

Never, ever believe anything a politician or a Real Estate Developer tells you.


Directions to here:

Also: Vinyl is heavy.