I know it's coming as soon as Christmas is over.
I can feel the chill coming, even if it's unseasonably warm out.
I remember what it feels like to have all the air leave the room.
And the unanswered questions that I normally skate around to save sanity,
spring up unannounced as I see the dates on the calendar pass by,
the questions lurk and haunt.
The why's.
The if only's.
The endless what if's.
But there's a blessing too, because I let myself feel more.
Remember more.
Cry, Laugh, Smile more.
And listen to heaven more.
It's a sad time...cause I miss her so much...and wish I could just once again, see her smiling and laughing with us.
But it's also a good thing...
cause I see how blessed we all are because of the gifts she's left behind and how they are woven into the fabric of our family's character.
Our Family is A circle of Strength and Love.
And she would be very proud of that.
Of us.
So as much as I would sometimes like to skip from January to March,
I'll take february too, one day at a time, just like she taught us to do.
Directions to here:
"Life ain't always beautiful:
Some days, I miss your smile.
I get tired of walkin' all, These lonely miles.
And I wish for just one minute, I could see your pretty face.
Guess I can dream, But life don't work that way.
But the struggles make me stronger,
And the changes make me wise.
And happiness has it's own way, Of takin' it's sweet time.
No, life ain't always beautiful.
But I know I'll be fine.
Hey, life ain't always beautiful,
But it's a beautiful ride.
What a beautiful ride."
(from Gary Allan's "Life Ain't Always Beautiful)"
copy/paste and listen to it here:
http://countrymusic.about.com/library/blga-laab.htm
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