Flashback Friday...Charlotte, Stories and Time

Tomorrow I will go to the Celebration of Life of Charlotte DeKock.

You may not remember meeting Charlotte, but let's see if I can help you make the connection.

Charlotte was my mom's first cousin.
Their moms were sisters.

If you are older than me, you may remember Charlotte as your teacher.
She taught at Center School and Hebron for years.

If you are my age or my siblings age, you might remember Aunt Helen and Uncle Bush Doyle who lived in Hebron, next to Aunt Jess.
Charlotte was their daughter.

If you are my age or one of my older nephews or nieces, you might remember Sally Allen, a teacher at the Middle School and Lowell High school.
Charlotte was Sally's mother.

If you live in Lake County, you might know these landmarks along 173rd (the road that Susie, Elden, Mike, Patty and Dave have all called their address over the years). The "Brown House" and "Golden Eagle Farm?" Charlotte was the owner.

(and if you are my Dad, you will remember Charlotte's family as your landlord...as Grandpa & Grandma Vandercar lived on and farmed the Doyle farm at one time).

As the list of connections grow, you can imagine that there is a lot of life to celebrate.

DeKock, Charlotte of Hebron, IN, passed away on Monday, January 31, 2011 at Oak Grove Nursing Home in Demotte, IN. Charlotte is survived by her son: William (Sandra) Knarr of Kokomo, IN; grandson: Timothy (Dionne) Allen of Indianapolis, IN; nephews: Bernie Doyle, Patrick Doyle, and Jeffrey Doyle of Hebron, IN; great-nephew: Andrew Patrick Doyle; great-niece: Kara Jane Doyle; step-daughters: Mary Stiles of Greenfield, IN, Kathryn Searle of Orem, UT, and Helen (Max) Fishero of Hebron, IN; step-grandchildren; step-great-grandchildren, and step-great-great-grandchildren. She was preceded in death by her first husband: Harry Dale Knarr; second husband: J. John DeKock; brother: James Doyle; daughter: Sally Jane Allen. Charlotte spent 29 years as a public school teacher at Center and Hebron Schools. She traveled throughout the United States and the world both in her early years and continued exploring into her 80's. She was well liked in the community where she lived her entire life and was known for her love of reading books, passion for watching Chicago sports teams and tennis and her generosity to all whom she met. During her life she was a member of the Hebron United Methodist Church and the Range Line Presbyterian Church as well as several local women's groups. A Memorial Service will be held on Saturday, February 12, 2011 at 1:00 PM at Geisen Funeral-Cremation & Reception Centre (NOTE: NEW LOCATION-2 blocks east of Broadway) at 606 E. 113th Ave., Crown Point, IN. Friends may visit with the family on Saturday, February 12, 2011 from 12:00 to 1:00 PM at Geisen Funeral-Cremation & Reception Centre. In lieu of flowers, memorial contributions may be given to The Hebron Public Library. Sign guestbook or view directions at www.GeisenFuneralHome.com. 219-663-2500. 


I was sad to hear the news of Charlotte's passing.
Sad to see another family member leave us.
Charlotte was quite a character and a real lady.
She was always interested in my work overseas and was very generous in her support of my work and various other causes. When I went to work at the bookstore, a whole new topic of conversation came up as to what I was reading and what was next on her book list.
I was sad to know that I will not see her lovely smile or hear her laugh again.

I also felt sad that I had let her down.
I remember saying goodbye to her at Sally's memorial service and she said to me "Don't forget about me!" I knew what she was saying, but I turned it around and made it about her and her unique personality and told her it would be impossible to forget someone like her. I knew what she was really saying was "don't forget to come visit me."

And I did visit.
Every time that Aunt Mary would come to Indiana, we would go see Char.
The last time we called, she wasn't up for a visit, but we all chatted on the phone. She told me next time call a few days ahead and she would be ready for me. But time flies....

Last September Jane and I talked about needing to go see Char to show her some pics and get some stories down...
but time flies....

and now, I'm so very sad that time flies....
and with time....all those stories of that very full life she lead have flown away with her.

And oh the stories!
I am just now realizing that Charlotte was 9 years older than my mom.
She knew EVERYONE...on my mom's side of the family.
She knew my grandparents. My Great Aunts. My Great Uncles. My Aunts. My Uncles. Even little Winfred. She would have been there. For everything. My mom's birth. Aunt Mary's birth. Grandpa Bryant's Dillinger story. Births, weddings, funerals. All of it.

And if you don't believe me ask Aunt Mary (another lady with a lot of stories) who wrote this memory on Char's memorial page guestbook:

"Seventy-five years ago Charlotte was teaching the 5th and 6th grade classes at Center School in Eagle Creek township. I was in the second grade and I did not like school or my teacher. I think I was quite a problem. For punishment my teacher would make me sit out in the hall. If Charlotte saw me she would come and get me and take me to her classroom. There I could sit with my older sister, Helen Jean. Thanks to Charlotte, my cousin, I survived the second grade." Mary Lou Ann Bryant Cobb If I'm reading Aunt Mary's story right, that means Charlotte was my mom's teacher and she knew my mom when my mom looked like this: Oh, the questions I have! Oh, the stories, untold. The older I get the more I realize I may be too young for this memory keeper gig. If I had only known what questions to ask when so many of the story tellers were still with us. But I was a surly teenager and then a young adult, absorbed in my own life. And all that time, time was flying. Now, I am trying to make up for lost time. Looking, listening and writing it all down....but time flies. God Bless you Charlotte. You were always kind to me. You, your smile and that laugh will be missed.