Flashback Friday...101 W. 181st

January 25 marks 27 years since Grandma Fern passed away.

She was the only Grandparent I ever knew as Mom's side had passed away before I was born and I was just two years old when Grandpa Vandercar died. 

I was a lucky kid, 'cause her house was a stone's throw from my front door.

101 W. 181st Street.

She was my constant companion while growing up.
If she ever tired of me running thru that white door, she never let it show.
She never refused my requests for snacks or sleepovers or marathon games of double solitaire or chinese checkers.
I can close my eyes and still see every nook and cranny of the little red house...from the mission style rocker to the chalk ware Chinese people on the tall dresser, to the pictures on the wall.

She was there.
Constant.
Every single day of my life.

But little kids grow up.
I can remember, in my teenage years, getting off the bus and walking by her door and thinking, I should stop in more.

I can only imagine how hard it was for her to see that little kid grow up and seem to need her less and less.

I wish I could go back to the 14 year old me and tell me how good this advice was.
I wish I could go back and sit and listen to EVERY WORD she said.
I wish I knew the questions I have now and I wish I would have asked them.
The questions about The Kenney Store, Grandpa Tilton's finger, Orchard Grove School, houses they lived in, recipes she knew by heart, Indians in the woods, Uncle Ralph's house, the house before Uncle Ralph's house, Christmas day weddings, gypsies at the door, heart stopping telegrams and on and on and on.
I wish I could ask her the questions I have about people by the name of Stella Wallace, Jeremiah, Aunt Tin, Tossie, Flossie, Persis, Hattie, Effie, Fay, Albert,...the endless list of people, places and things that only she would remember.
She would know all the answers.
All of them.

But alas the Poet/songwriter is right:
               "But there never seems to be enough time to do the things you want to do once you find them."
                                                                                                                        Jim Croce

And 14 year olds don't ask, cause they don't know the right questions and they don't know then what they are gonna know later.
And answers fly away.

But there is one thing that has remained true.
Whether a child, teenager or adult....

I love my Grandma Fern.

I miss you too, Grandma.

Directions to here:
whether you are
4, 14, 24, 44, 64 or 94....share your questions, stories, memories and answers!

Flash....FORWARD Friday....

Yes.

Flash Forward.

I admit it.
Being a memory keeper, I spend a lot of time in Flash......back mode.

I am working on scanning my photos, mom and dad's photos, cousins photos, your photos.
I've read The Kenney book that Carl Kenney Jr. wrote and cross referenced it with Ruby's genealogy book and I am finally starting to wrap my head around these ancient photos, stories and crazy, related to each other 3 different ways, family.

I spend a lot of time thinking about people who are not with us anymore.
Walking thru the grave yards with Ruby was a sobering experience. At some point she turned and said "I know a lot of people here!" Sadly, she probably knows more people below ground than above ground.

And it made me want to cling to every moment I have in the present.

I have done a lot of wishing that I could have known more about our ancestors. And I'm trying to track down stories before it is too late. To keep those memories. And in so doing keep the memory of those people alive.

But the memory keeping is not just for those who have left us.
Yes, I hope they look down and are pleased that I am remembering them.
But, I've found that a very big part of being a memory keeper is not just in order to honor those who have gone on before us...but to preserve memories for those who will come after us.

To write it down, to tell the story, to take the picture, to save the picture, so that the little people who we spend our time with will have an idea of who we were.
Of how much we loved each other.
Of how much we loved them.
That THEY may look back and know who they are and who they come from.

It is with this AWESOME awareness...that I flash forward to the day that I tell Erin Elizabeth about the day she was born and how her Grandma and I changed her name 6 times on the way to the hospital to wait for her to be born.

"I don't know how Grandma Susie found out what your name was to be, because apparently your big brother, Drew knew your name, but was not telling anyone...no matter how much or with what your Uncle Bobby tried to bribe him. All he would talk about was "taking baby to the beach."
Anyway, we knew you were supposed to be a girl, and someone had told me that day that your mom and dad had picked out the name, Erin.

I was up from Indianapolis for your cousins, Adam and Ali's wedding shower...and I was VERY happy that you decided to make your birthday on a day that I was there!

There was Sunshine when we left the shower and got to the farm. But then it turned very Windy and the clouds started to roll in as well as Uncle Bobby, who was on the tractor planting corn. Grandma Susie was hustling me along, trying to get to the hospital before it turned Stormy.

We got in the car before the Rain started, but it really let loose as we headed up Colorado. Of course this didn't slow Grandma Susie down and as we flew over the hills in Southeast Grove, I thought of your Great Grandma Helen, who grew up and played in this Grove and I wondered if, while playing with her baby doll, she ever imagined having a real live doll, let alone 3 generations of babies : )

By the time we turned west to cross over to the nine mile stretch, the sky was looking pretty scary. Even tho there was still Sunshine ahead of us the sky behind us looked like it had turned into night. And that's when the Hail started to hit.

Now, hail is pretty scary when you are safe inside, but with your Grandma not slowing down and lightening and thunder all around, it was pretty crazy having that hail fall and hit our windshield head on, but your Grandma was on a mission and kept right on driving. I turned into my mom, your Grandma, and started quoting her "oooh. I don't like this lightening!"

By the time we reached the hospital, the hail had stopped, but it was still pouring Rain, but never fear, we used our umbrellas that we had just received as favors at the wedding shower.

We made our way up to where your mom and dad were walking the halls, trying to coax you to hurry up and make your appearance.
By the time we settled into the waiting room...we looked out the window and we were back to SUNSHINE.

So, little girl. As you can see you were a child of the Elements!
Your crazy Aunt Nancy suggested changing your name to "Sunshine" or "Windy" or "Stormy" or "Rain" or "Hailey" because you went thru all those to get to us on that "Spring" day that you joined our family.

Fortunately for you, no one listens to crazy Aunt Nancy and they stuck with Erin.
And I have to admit when I met you and you were just 40 minutes old, Erin was a perfect fit.

Now, you take that memory and keep it and tell it to your child on the day your first grand baby is born. And don't forget your umbrella...you never know what might happen on the way to the hospital!"

Directions to here:

Write it down, take a picture, record it all. BACK UP YOUR HARD DRIVE!!! Keep those memories!